Now there's an "Idiot's Guide" for ghosts and ghost-hunters
I don't know if we should be offended or thankful! Read all about it at:
www.madison.com/wsj/home/features/
index.php?ntid=59138&ntpid=55
'Idiot's Guide' takes a walk on the paranormal side
PETER CAMERON
pcameron@madison.com
October 25, 2005
Thomas Edison was working on a device to communicate with the dead before he died. No joke. At least not according to the "Idiot's Guide to Ghosts." Just in time for Halloween, the Complete Idiot's Guide has released several books to inform you about ghosts, witches, elves and fairies. And for you lazy idiots out there, I have sifted through the many references to "Ghostbusters," "Lord of the Rings," "Harry Potter" and "The Wizard of Oz," in order to reveal the most helpful parts.
Ghosts and Hauntings
This one contains nuggets such as the astral body is a vehicle to carry the soul on its journeys. It also explains that a "person whose spirit travels is unconscious or heavily medicated at the time," and gives "mental illness" as a cause for spectral phenomena. Also, many ghosts will leave when asked to leave, find out they're dead, or "have the situation properly explained to them." Should any of these methods fail, the book recommends you "keep a working flashlight in your pocket at all times."
Finally, when creating your own phony ghost pictures, shoot your "ghost" image slightly out of focus. "That way, it'll be less obvious that it's fake in the final photograph." A list of haunted restaurants, hotels, and paranormal investigators is also included.
Elves and Fairies
The book doesn't give its readers any benefit of the doubt by stating "London is a huge city with lots of buildings and people." About "Lord of the Rings," it says "many people already consider it a classic." But according to this book, adults are "less aware of elves and fairies," and separation between humans and fairies has become much more pronounced "as humans forlornly and foolishly encase themselves in plastic concrete and steel." It suggests the best time to meet an elf or fairy is at sunrise or sunset, "when the division of day an light, dark and light come together."
Should you come in contact with an elf, "remember to defer to him or her and mirror their own behavior patterns - soft voice flowing actions." Attracting good elves and fairies can help in growing plants, protecting yourself from bad fairies and elves, and "expanding your psychic abilities and intuition." And remember, folks, these guys only likefresh food and drink. Should you ever feel yourself being followed on a dark night by an energy that wants to do you harm, "go to a body of water such as a creak or a stream and cross over it." Evil can't swim!
Wicca and Witchcraft
The current definition of Wicca is an "Earth-based religion that honors both the God and Goddess." Witches don't believe in Satan, and the Rule of Three states that those who use witchcraft against others will come back to the aggressor threefold. The book recommends Wiccan bookshops as good places to meet other witches and get involved in witchcraft (and, conveniently, you could pick up this book while you're there).
According to this Idiot's Guide, a federal appeals court ruled Wicca to be a legally recognized religion, and is thus protected by the Constitution. It estimates the number of Wiccan in the United States to be somewhere in between 250,000 and 1 million. And though some covens of witches prefer to practice their craft in the nude, feeling that clothing restricts their magical energy, "that does not mean that the coven members are engaged in an orgy."
Spells and Spellcraft
These can be used for a plethora of things, such as improving self-confidence or courage. When casting a spell, the flame of a candle can be an effective focal point for you, but if you think you'll go into a trance, "it would be best to have someone with you, especially if you choose to work near a body of water or a live flame."
It is unethical to use a spell to make someone fall in love with you, but you can use one to strengthen a relationship. The book recommends baking snicker doodles with cinnamon and cardamom, and "while you add these spices to the cookie dough, concentrate on your magical intent and infuse the dough with it." Then feed them to your loved one.
There are spells for well-being and success, including a recipe for money drawing oil, made up of frankincense, heliotrope oil, orange oil and cinnamon oil. But don't try to make it, because I haven't given you the required portions.
www.madison.com/wsj/home/features/
index.php?ntid=59138&ntpid=55
'Idiot's Guide' takes a walk on the paranormal side
PETER CAMERON
pcameron@madison.com
October 25, 2005
Thomas Edison was working on a device to communicate with the dead before he died. No joke. At least not according to the "Idiot's Guide to Ghosts." Just in time for Halloween, the Complete Idiot's Guide has released several books to inform you about ghosts, witches, elves and fairies. And for you lazy idiots out there, I have sifted through the many references to "Ghostbusters," "Lord of the Rings," "Harry Potter" and "The Wizard of Oz," in order to reveal the most helpful parts.
Ghosts and Hauntings
This one contains nuggets such as the astral body is a vehicle to carry the soul on its journeys. It also explains that a "person whose spirit travels is unconscious or heavily medicated at the time," and gives "mental illness" as a cause for spectral phenomena. Also, many ghosts will leave when asked to leave, find out they're dead, or "have the situation properly explained to them." Should any of these methods fail, the book recommends you "keep a working flashlight in your pocket at all times."
Finally, when creating your own phony ghost pictures, shoot your "ghost" image slightly out of focus. "That way, it'll be less obvious that it's fake in the final photograph." A list of haunted restaurants, hotels, and paranormal investigators is also included.
Elves and Fairies
The book doesn't give its readers any benefit of the doubt by stating "London is a huge city with lots of buildings and people." About "Lord of the Rings," it says "many people already consider it a classic." But according to this book, adults are "less aware of elves and fairies," and separation between humans and fairies has become much more pronounced "as humans forlornly and foolishly encase themselves in plastic concrete and steel." It suggests the best time to meet an elf or fairy is at sunrise or sunset, "when the division of day an light, dark and light come together."
Should you come in contact with an elf, "remember to defer to him or her and mirror their own behavior patterns - soft voice flowing actions." Attracting good elves and fairies can help in growing plants, protecting yourself from bad fairies and elves, and "expanding your psychic abilities and intuition." And remember, folks, these guys only likefresh food and drink. Should you ever feel yourself being followed on a dark night by an energy that wants to do you harm, "go to a body of water such as a creak or a stream and cross over it." Evil can't swim!
Wicca and Witchcraft
The current definition of Wicca is an "Earth-based religion that honors both the God and Goddess." Witches don't believe in Satan, and the Rule of Three states that those who use witchcraft against others will come back to the aggressor threefold. The book recommends Wiccan bookshops as good places to meet other witches and get involved in witchcraft (and, conveniently, you could pick up this book while you're there).
According to this Idiot's Guide, a federal appeals court ruled Wicca to be a legally recognized religion, and is thus protected by the Constitution. It estimates the number of Wiccan in the United States to be somewhere in between 250,000 and 1 million. And though some covens of witches prefer to practice their craft in the nude, feeling that clothing restricts their magical energy, "that does not mean that the coven members are engaged in an orgy."
Spells and Spellcraft
These can be used for a plethora of things, such as improving self-confidence or courage. When casting a spell, the flame of a candle can be an effective focal point for you, but if you think you'll go into a trance, "it would be best to have someone with you, especially if you choose to work near a body of water or a live flame."
It is unethical to use a spell to make someone fall in love with you, but you can use one to strengthen a relationship. The book recommends baking snicker doodles with cinnamon and cardamom, and "while you add these spices to the cookie dough, concentrate on your magical intent and infuse the dough with it." Then feed them to your loved one.
There are spells for well-being and success, including a recipe for money drawing oil, made up of frankincense, heliotrope oil, orange oil and cinnamon oil. But don't try to make it, because I haven't given you the required portions.
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